Sunday, December 14, 2014


Scratch that... BFN this morning on two different tests. Heart. Broken.

Saturday, December 13, 2014


Today is 9sp3dt and I decided to throw caution to the wind and POAS. It was  0230 am and seeing nothing but stark white blankness I tossed the test aside and went back to bed. Got up to pee and saw it lying there 3.5hours later and dudes.... There's a line!!

It's not even a squinter!!!!!

But... 1) It wasn't within the 5min window, 2) I had an HCG Booster shot on Tue. (And I didn't test it out).

Right now I feel cramps coming on...

4days since 2,500 iu booster HCG?  It barely shows up for me when I even trigger. This line is about the same as my trigger test line. :/

Beta not till Fri!!

ETA: this morning was an Internet cheapie and I know that evaps are common. Hubs went and got us an FRER and I tested with a couple drops of 4th MU... Two lines. Clearly.

Clinic says not to get excited till Tues 7 days post hCG booster. Arghhh!!

Thursday, December 4, 2014

4A and 2A

Apparently one of the "watched" embryos did split so we had a 2A this morning unexpectedly to add to our 4A.

This doesn't look good. 4 cells on day 3? Googling success rates has only confirmed my fears that this is the official end for us.. All this bedrest and restrictions feels like a farce.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

We're (quietly) at it again...

Yes. With my own eggs. After the stupendous failure of our "genetic testing cycle" we were exploring donor eggs with great gusto... Until we got the price tag. It's completely outside of what we can afford. Even with insurance covering my portion.

We have all co-pays and deductibles met for 2014 and we decided to squeeze in one last cycle with my own eggs before we call it quits and take a year off to reevaluate things.

It all happened so quickly. I got a call saying, we need you to start stims tomorrow. We're gonna skip the BCP." And we were off to the races. 5 days of stims and my first check up revealed 5 follie already at  14mm!! We had our ER on Monday - 7 eggs. Maturity- 6.

This mornings Fert report was sucky... 3 are definitely not fertilized. 3 others are possibly fertilized, but he doesn't see the poles so he can't be sure. It is POSSIBLE that the poles are disappearing as division is beginning - when he checked there this morning.. So tonight I am in a panic...  I either have 3 or nothing... And it's going to be about 10hours before I find out.

This cycle has been weird from the start and we had soooo hoped that  was a good sign. But today I've felt like really nothing has changed. 3 Fert, 1 day 3, no snugglers,  the end..

Please let me be wrong. PLEASE!!!

If we're lucky enough to have some day 3 embies we're putting them all back.  This is our Hail Mary. Our last ditch effort.