Wednesday, August 6, 2014

I think we've found HER...

Was catching up with a good friend yesterday. She asked how things are going with IVF and I gave her the update - we're doing PGS, possibly moving to donor eggs after that, but struggling to find a donor who matches our main requirements.

She immediately started telling me about her cousin who she has always told me looked just like me. She sent me a pic. This girl is gorgeous! Not as tall as me. I don't think she looks LIKE ME perse but she checks most of the boxes. Over 5'7, curly blonde hair, big blue eyes. 

I have some concerns. Firstly she is 19. I don't know that a decision like this is something she's ready for. At 19 I was a child. Secondly she has a full ride at one of the nations top colleges for her musical talent. I would hate to interrupt that in any way. Thirdly, how do I feel about a "known" donor? 

My friend spoke with her briefly by text and explained our situation and asked if she'd ever considered donating eggs. She replied, "If they needed someone I'd be happy to help! How's life otherwise."  So yeah... I dunno if she thinks my friend is serious. Anyway, I gave my friend my donor coordinators email address. Told her to give it some thought and if she feels able to help please contact my DC who can answer questions, etc. I don't want to have direct contact with her until she has thought this over and made decisions about her contact comfort level, etc. What is the protocol on this?? Can anyone advise? Part of me wants to present her with a brochure of our life - who we are and why we'd be great parents and do the hard sell. But again, she's so young and has so much going on and I don't want to be pushy, but am I being too blasé? 

I don't want to get my hopes up, but y'all she is a better match than I could have ever dreamt of!


  1. I think you're doing the right thing. She sounds well-meaning, but she obviously has NO idea what's involved in donating eggs. She needs to hear about all of the details first and then make her decision, and that will be hard if she meets you first and feels like she owes you. I really hope this works out!

  2. I agree with Aramis on this. :)