We've had some surprisingly good news:
Mr R's 10 month post vasectomy reversal SA came back good. There are swimmers present, and from what I can understand of his numbers his motility is "low average" and his count is too. Still... low average is better than a big fat 0, so now we feel more like we're in with a chance for natural. At any rate, his numbers are such that we can save ourselves the $1,700 needed for TESE in Prague, so that's a plus too.
I had the weirdest period this month. It was 3 days late and I will be honest, I had the daydreams... but I refused to test until I was a week late - I am NEVER late, so this was highly unusual. On CD 31 i started spotting, and on I had one day of regular flow, one day of my usual extreme cramping, doubled over, stay in bed kind of flow and then it just stopped.... I normally have 1 day of light, 3 days of ridiculous, 1 day of light and we're done. This month it was just 2 days and done after being 3 days late... so of course my little day dream started again, but I didn't give it
Today, CD 12, I was a bundle of nerves walking into the clinic. I hated sitting in that waiting room again. Luckily I had a new u/s tech so I didn't have to do the whole "ohhhh you're still here, I am so sorry it hasn't worked out for y'all" talk. This lady didn't know me from a bar of soap and she also apparently had no clue what the reason for my check-up was. She announced that my lining was triamilar and perfect and as she checked my ovaries she announced "Oh you have two great follies on the left, you're probably going to trigger in the next day or two!" Apparently I have 2 15mm follies on the left. She seemed to think we were IUI patients, and since she pronounced my insides to be in perfect order for an IUI cycle at CD12 I thought I would Google what the ideal was...
Here's what I don't understand... from what I am reading online these women who are on Chlomid and on CD 12 have on average 2-3 follies of between 10 and 18mm... Here I am with my useless ovaries, non existent AMH and my too-high FSH and I have 2 15mm au naturale follies. Is this a good thing? Should Mr R and I clear our schedules and spend the next 4 days in bed? Am I crazy to even think that we have a chance here after 4 failed IVF cycles?
For all I know the playing field looks this good every month - I've only ever seen it pumped up on drugs - and we've never been successful before so what would make this month any different, just because I am aware of what's going on in there.
Ugh... I just read through my cycle history and brought myself back down to earth... I could be showing 100 follies at 15mm today and all of them could release this weekend and the odds of me getting pregnant are still miniscule since my damn eggs are all dodgy. Bleurgh... I am going to go and clean something and stop thinking about this crap...